False Advertising

Moving to New York is a lonely thing and some days you really want some companionship. The other day I was walking home and saw this interesting flyer.




Is this a message from above, from a guardian angel in the form of the original Swinger, Vince Vaughn, who's trying to pump me up? "Hey, things aren't happenin' in your timing, but chin up young man, cause' I got a message for you! That's right, all these birds in this Big Apple we call home, they like something...what is it? Read the flyer my man, read the flyer."

I looked from left to right, and peered into this summons of enouragement. Hey, if a guy feels down on his, luck it's nice to know that the opposite sex thinks he's A-OK. Even if you can't pay the rent, can't catch a break, your Mets tryout got cancelled due to the fact that you haven't played left field since 4th grade....at the end of the day, you've still got this. The sirens of New York sing to you that you're fetching.

"You're fetching!" (in song)

So I looked closer.






I hate you New York.